Every year the Christmas season brings with it cold winds and even colder emotions. Christmas seems to be the time to swallow (all that food) and wallow (in all that emo-ness). This year is no different. As early as November Migs noticed an increase in letter senders bemoaning their lonely status for Christmas. Even a local commercial made use of the term SMP (Samahan ng mga Malalamig ang Pasko). And while we rarely hear about it, an increase in depression and suicide is often recorded in December.
So, as a fitting end to 2010, the Fabcasters gathered once more to record a two part series [on the topic of loneliness].
Do I feel lonely? I was asked that during the podcast. Yes, sometimes--but mostly no. I was the poster boy for emo-ness in my high school days, long before the term was coined. But age and experience does bring a sense of stability, perspective and proportion to how I saw things, and the first casualty of that was pointless, fruitless wallowing on my part. Nowadays, I see myself as basically a cheerful person; I don't sulk, I don't brood, I don't like seeing myself hunched inward. Recognizing the feeling is one thing; ceding my life to it is another.
But having said that, I know that melancholy can be deadly to some people. I hope anyone reading this or listening to our podcast who feels his or her own sense of loneliness has reached overwhelming proportions would find the strength to reach out to a friend, and find solace and help there. There are as many ways of coping as there are people going through the pangs of it (just listen to our guests in this podcast--from the young to the not-so-young, everyone has his way of trying to banish the blues). If you feel the shadows slinking in, go out, open up to someone, do something to take your mind off the restlessness. Just don't hurt yourself--because, as so many have said, it will get better. Loneliness can be deadly, but it need not be. And you are way bigger than it.
Ack! As the Fabcasters would say, nag-sermon na naman ako! Sensya na, 'yan po ang mabuting balita sa araw na ito. Humayo tayo't tumawa, humalakhak, bumungisngis, mag-shampoo ng dalawang beses 'ika nga ni Migs, at 'wag na 'wag papalupig sa kalongkotan!
Kumukutikutitap by San Miguel Master Chorale and Philharmonic Orchestra
Pasko Na, Sinta Ko by San Miguel Master Chorale and Philharmonic Orchestra
The Loneliest Person I Know by Splender
Eternal Flame by The Bangles
Lonely Is The Night by Air Supply
Wannabe by The Spice Girls
Loneliness Knows Me By Name by Westlife
PLUS: People like Sheba think they know what it is to be lonely. But of the drip-drip, long-haul, no-end-in-sight solitude, they know nothing. What it's like to construct an entire weekend around a visit to the launderette. Or to be so chronically untouched that the accidental brush of a bus conductor's hand sends a jolt of longing straight to your groin. -- Judi Dench in Notes of a Scandal, contrasting her parched life with that of Cate Blanchett's character Sheba. (Patrick Marber wrote the screenplay. He captures the uncapturable perfectly.)
More here--along with the song that both anatomizes and cauterizes the feeling, leading to (a measure of) hope. Yes, it gets better.